Stereotypes FTL

First off - remember that list of books we put together at the library (this is mostly Jess and Myles, I think). Well, the library ordered ALL of them!! Don't remember the list? I'll post what we put together when I'm at my work compy.

Secondly, I know it would hurt, but I just want to give this cat a gentle hug, a scritch behind the ear, and some catnip. This was really funny at the time because I had just woken up to a cat screeching and hissing in my house (instead of just the one young boy cat chasing Zephyr, both boys were antagonizing her and she was screesching at them WHILE hiding on top of my feet on the bed, which meant that when she smacked at them, she caught my foot with her claw and I screeched a bit).

Thirdly...do these even fit? And what would the Barbie stereotype for where you are now look like?

Limited Edition Vermont Barbie
Mattel recently announced the release of Limited Edition Barbie Dolls for the Vermont Market:

Williston Barbie
This princess Barbie is only sold at exclusive Williston stores. She comes with an assortment of Kate Spade Handbags, a Lexus SUV, a long-haired, foreign dog named Honey and a cookie cutter house. Available with or without tummy tuck and face lift. Workaholic Ken sold only in conjunction with "augmented" version.

South Burlington Barbie
This modern day homemaker Barbie is available with Ford Windstar Minivan and matching gym outfit. She gets lost easily and has no full time occupation or secondary education. Traffic jamming cell phone sold separately.

Old North End Barbie
This recently paroled Barbie comes with a 9mm handgun, a Ray Lewis knife, a Chevy with dark tinted windows and a Meth Lab Kit. This model is only available after dark and can only be paid for in cash. Preferably small, untraceable bills. Unless you are a cop, then we don't know what you are talking about.

Essex / Shelburne Barbie
This yuppie Barbie comes with your choice of BMW convertible or Hummer h3. Included are her own Starbucks cup, credit card and country club membership. Also available for this set are Shallow Ken and Private School Skipper. You won't be able to afford any of them.

Milton Barbie
This pale model comes dressed in her own Wrangler jeans two sizes too small, a NASCAR shirt and tweety bird tattoo on her shoulder. She has a six pack of Coors light and a Hank Williams, Jr. CD set. She can spit over 5 feet and kick mullet-haired Ken's butt when she's drunk. Purchuse her pickup truck separately and get a confederate flag bumper sticker absolutely free.

Stowe Barbie
This collagen injected, rhinoplastic Barbie wears a leopard print ski outfit and drinks Cosmopolitans while entertaining friends at the lodge. Optional Percocet prescription available.

Barton Barbie
This tobacco chewing, brassy haired Barbie has a pair of her own high-heeled sandals with one broken heel from the time she chased Beer-Gutted Ken out of Hardwick Barbie's house. Her ensemble includes low rise acid washed jeans, fake finger nails, and a see through halter top. Also available with a mobile home and 8-track tape player.

Montpelier Barbie
This doll is made of actual tofu. She has long straight brown hair, arch-less feet, hairy armpits, no makeup and Birkenstocks with white socks. She prefers that you call her "Willow". She does not want or need a Ken doll, but if you purchase two Montpelier Barbies and the optional Subaru wagon, you get a rainbow flag sticker for free.

Richmond Barbie
This Barbie comes with her own mountain bike. Available with SUV, complete with Kayak on the roof and dog in the back. Optional Ken doll also comes with his own mountain bike and dog.

Barre Barbie
This Barbie is only 14 and comes with a stroller and infant doll. Optional accessories include a GED and bus pass. Gangsta Ken and his '79 Caddy were available, but are now very difficult to find since the addition of the infant.

Finally, 30-second bunnies and Office Space.